Missing In Action ………No This Isn’t One Of Chuck Norris’ Lame A_s Movies ……………….. Hello Tiger Meet Brett It Appears That The Two of You Have Something In Common ?

Missing In Action ………No This Isn’t One Of Chuck Norris’ Lame A_s Movies ……………….. Hello Tiger Meet Brett It Appears That The Two of You Have Something In Common ?

Well my friends , well at least I hope I can call you each individually a friend ? Here it is right off the bat, the NFL season is almost at an end. All that is left is for the rather redundant ‘NFL Pro Bowl’ game to be played and then on the ‘main event’ itself, the Superbowl (SBXLIV) . A sigh of relief shall we ? Well, I say that , as I’m entirely happy as that self aggrandizing and often petulant child, Brett Favre won’t be a participant in the main event itself. Thankfully , Drew Brees and the New Orleans Saints put that ‘bad boy to rest ! It’s not so much that I find him to annoying , which I do. But it has now become redundant to hear him once again opine and not come to an outright decision as to his immediate future. Were this any other person than Brett Favre, NFL player and ‘future Hall of Famer’. Then the mass market media of the print , sports’ talk radio and tv media in the guise of the sports’ broadcasters wouldn’t be hanging unto his every word as if this were the naming of a new ‘Pope’ . This is how asinine it has all become as the player is about weave his spell on the mice representing sports’ journalism . Much as the ‘Pied Piper of Hamlin’ had done in the classic children’s fable. Unfortunately for us it’s not Brett who’ll end up drowning but we the die-hard sports’ enthusiasts under the barrage of ‘none stop round the clock’ reporting on this whole media fiasco.

<strong> Favre  on the  field  of   play   for   the   Vikings  <s/trong>
Favre on the field of play for the Vikings

As much as I admirer the talent of Favre as a player , as a person off the field of player in terms of his general demeanor , he leaves a great deal to be desired. And as much as we now hear his Minnesota Vikings’ teammates talk of him in glowing terms, as to ‘the terrific season’ that he had. What cannot be lost in the midst of this all, is that the circus has started all over again and with it comes the media frenzy. About the only other individuals that I know of who can generate this amount of mass market media frenzy. One at present currently resides in the White House , none other than President Barack Obama. The others are Oprah Winfrey , ‘a cottage industry unto herself’, in terms of the pint media coverage that she attains and the fact that when she anoints a book or a writer, it or they become an immediate bestseller within the blink of an eye. And last but not least, is Michael Jackson. He’s dead and there’s now more being printed about him than at any other time prior to and during his last court trial. How the f_ck does that happen ? And why I might ask does it continue to do so to this day ?

The buffoons of ESPN talk about what they envisage on Brett Favre. Merril Hoge and Trent Dilfer show their worth as analysts. Worth a great deal of excrement as far as I’m concerned !

With Favre and the Vikings’ season having been curtailed in the NFC championship game loss the the Saints by the result of 31-28 . It has to be said that after that loss the thought might be that Favre ride off into the sunset , waving goodbye to the fans , as bids them farewell. That’s how it’s suppose to go with most fairy tale endings , isn’t it ? But this isn’t a fairy tale as it has manifested itself into friggin’ nightmare of monstrous proportions.

Brett Favre’s indecision as to his immediate future it appears, hasn’t taught anyone within the Vikings’ front office a lesson at all. Vikings’ coach, Brad Childress , as a recently as Tuesday, stated that Favre can take as much time as he wants before coming to a decision as to his future with the team and the NFL. Pardon me for saying this but unless there’s been a recent bereavement in his family, then there’s no way in hell that he ought to be allowed that sort of latitude ! . We’ve seen how the player handled his prior issues as it concerned what we all thought was an impending retirement. So much so, that it ran the gamut of mass hysteria on the part of the press and in particular the ‘squawk boxes’ within ESPN. There the unabashed admiration and adulation of Favre borders on being homo-erotic. And for the likes of ESPN NFL analyst’s, Mark Schlereth and Merril Hoge, it’s almost akin to the secretive homosexual relationship that took place in the Ang Lee directed movie ‘Brokeback Mountain’ (2005) between the two main characters, Ennis Del Mar and Jack Twist , portrayed by Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal . Now I’m half expecting either Hoge and Schlereth to let us know that their admiration for Favre is nothing more than a boyish adulation. That may be all well and good but neither of the two aforementioned individuals have ever been known to be critical of the player when he’s being playing bad for this or any other team that he has played over the course of his two decade career.

If Childress’ statement about Favre was a way of either deferring or avoid upcoming controversy , then it may well come back to bite him in the ass at some point in the future. Minnesota Vikings’ team owner, Zygi Wilf, has yet to issue any sort of formal statement concerning the situation. And one can only surmise that he much like Childress , is prepared to sit and wait this one out. Now very much like the decision making when it comes to the anointing of a Pope , we await the plumes of smoke to rise up into the heavens before Favre beckons us all to make his decision. We know it’s not bound to be emphatic, as Favre is about is as decisive as former Democratic Presidential candidate, Sen. John Kerry (D-Ma). His indecision and that one monstrous statement that can be directly attributed to him …….”I actually did vote for the $87 billion, before I voted against it.” …at the time this was in response to voting legislation funding the troops for the war in Iraq. And we wondered why he lost to George W. Bush in a Presidential election ? Who’s no vessel of intellectual intelligence, himself !

The problems of PGA Tour player and world number one, Tiger Woods, have been well chronicled over the past two months. And the player’s self denial has been parodied and become the ‘fodder’ for the late night talk show hosts. Even the heifers of ABC’s ‘The View’ have seen fit to chime in with their thoughts on Tiger Woods’ now well documented sexual exploits and sexcapades. You’d have thought that he’d ‘nailed more females’ than his official tour wins on the PGA Tour, by the way that they’ve been carrying on. But then when it comes to a woman scorned who knows of their plight better than that of another woman who just wants to either castrate and emasculate the first man that they see no matter what their character might happen to be ? Alas, for these women one cut to Tiger’s nuts might not be just enough to keep them at bay.

The body language says a great deal about a person. Woods in happier times.fee]HE

Now strange as this may seem , somehow the paparazzi and now the print media have reported that Woods has been seen at a sexual rehabilitation clinic. Nothing wrong in that at all I might add. Better he be cured of what ails him , rather than carrying on the way that he has done , doing a great deal of harm not only to himself but also to his character and that of his immediate family. His wife, Elin and their two young children have to be in some way hurting as to his sexual indiscretions. And for the now more than fifteen women who’ve come forward to say that they’ve had sex with Tiger. My words of advice to them all “………skanks get yourselves tested ” ! If Tiger’s done all of you, then he’s done each of you multiple times over. Because if as it has been widely been reported, a number of you shared the player at the same time. Then Woods’ actions aren’t just egregious but downright criminal and they border on being done with malicious intent and in no way can those actions be forgiven. God or Christ as the case maybe, may love a
sinner but surely not one who’ll repeatedly make the same mistake over and over again. And then chooses the press as mockery to atone for what is said to be a mistake ! A mistake is not meant to be an action that one deliberately repeats several times over . So sorry Tiger, but you’ve longer got my respect at all !

Eldrick ‘Tiger’ Woods, whoever said ‘that having ‘ 9 iron doesn’t help your game’…. has got to be kidding. You’ve been hittin’ more ‘tail’ and ‘rough’ than Jean Van der Velde did, when he had that monumental meltdown at the 1999 British Open, at Carroustie , in Scotland. Who can forget that mess on Van der Velde’s part ? One minute he’s in the lead down the stretch with less than four holes to play. The next he’s ‘submerged in the drink’ . And no way to acquit himself of his multiple mistakes. Much likes in a similar vain, Woods has yet to atone for his own misdeeds but he’s now allegedly said to be trying . But first shouldn’t he have accept the responsibility for his very actions and be held accountable ? An innocuous statement over the internet hardly makes that statement.

For Woods and his daily sojourn into sex rehab , well that’s all well and good. But what has really surprised me is where Tiger Woods is said to be undergoing sexual rehab treatment. Far be it for me to suggest , but a black man ……….(screw being politically correct) ….. attending a sexual rehab clinic in Hattiesburg , Mississippi , is akin to asking for trouble, given Woods’ sexual proclivities and the mere fact that the vast majority of his sexual partners were Caucasian ! I am surprised that there’s yet to have been a ‘Klan rally’ in the city of Hattiesburg ! But I digress, that sort of thing doesn’t happen anymore now, does it ? I mean we’re now living in the twenty first century and the racial divide between the races is said to have gotten smaller, rather than larger. Perhaps , someone ought to remind Pat Robertson of that ? After his racial and totally abhorrent diatribe aimed at the tiny nation of Haiti. The statements attributed to him , shows how unintelligent and unenlightened he is as a man who purports to be a Christian. A pox on him , his multitude of asinine and idiotic supporters !

Woods’ self proposed ‘indefinite leave of absence’ from the PGA Tour , has left it without not only its biggest star but also its biggest draw. And Tiger Woods is essentially the pulse and heartbeat of the Tour. Without him on the course or greens and attendances and viewership plummets for not only the televised events but also the none televised also. And with total prize money on the Tour in excess of $ 270 million . One can well understand why PGA Tour Commissioner, Tim Finchem is acutely aware and concerned as to Woods’ prolonged and self imposed absence. The Tour’s corporate sponsors are then become reluctant to commit and work in conjunction the group. With each passing week that Woods is away from the Tour and the game , the greater the pain that is suffered by PGA Tour financially . And when they’re hurting it affects not only the sponsors but also all of the affiliated businesses that work alongside the PGA Tour. From airlines , to golf equipment and apparel makers, to restaurants, to hotels , to even the smallest family ran businesses that solely exists to service the needs of the PGA Tour and its patrons , including the fans. The ripple effect is like that of a stone being thrown into a lake or pond. Just seemingly watch the ripples created as they magnify in size. That’s ” Tiger Woods’ effect” on the PGA Tour . About the only other the person in the world who holds that sort of sway on an entity may well be Oprah Winfrey and her influence on the mass media entertainment field.

One now can only surmise as the length of time Woods will be away from a golf course never mind his absence from The Tour , as he undergoes treatment for his addiction. But this much is clear the likes of Phil Mickelson, Geoff Ogilvy, Vijay Singh , Rocco Mediate , Rory McIlroy, Pardraig Harrington , Steve Stricker , Ernie Els and Retief Goosen simply cannot capture the imagination of a crowd or a television audience the way that Woods can and still have them yearning for more . Doubt my word ? Then just watch but a few moments of a PGA Tour event , just to see what it’s like without Woods on the greens. The silence heard is almost as eerie as that of being in a graveyard in the dead of night and the you’re the only person in sight. Certainly not something that the fans of the sport, the television broadcasters or the PGA Tour commissioner would like to see for the foreseeable future. The longer the situation is prolonged . The more disastrous are the effects and the reverberations felt on the sport of golf and its associated partners on the PGA Tour.

Fave and Woods both have a great deal of soul searching to do. Decisions have to made and a commitment has to made as to their immediate futures. For Favre ,it’s to the game that he loves and the camaraderie of the NFL. In the case of Woods , it’s the chance to seek redemption and at the same to rewrite an egregious and the pain and suffering that he has caused to his immediate family and friends. He’s yet to offer the fans an apology , much less the young children who attend the charter school that’s a part of his foundation. A situation which Woods has made all the much worse with amoral lying and philandering. Never mind the fact, that to these young children , he espoused the virtues of honesty , being of good character but above all respect for one’s peers and elders. Something of which Tiger Woods, himself failed at and obfuscated all of the principles he espoused to those young kids. He much like his NFL counterpart , Brett Favre, have behaved like immature children. But now they’ll be using the press and print media alike, in order seek the public’s empathy. While they are missing in action , are their respective sports better off with or without them ? Seemingly, there’s no real right answer but somehow , we the public and the fans will be asked to look the other and act as if nothing at all has really happened .

Somethin’ to throw at you playa’ ….. ‘Stand Up’ by Ludacris feat’g Shawna. Love it y’all !
’bout it,’bout it, out it , out it !


Nicole <strong> "Coco"<strong>  Austin    ,  rapper  Ice-T's <em>  main  squeeze </em> and   fun   toy. <strong>   I  wonder     , where , when  and   how   he  makes  time  to   jack  an'   tap   that  a_s  up  ? </strong>  Inquiring  minds   need  to  know  and  they  damn  well  need  to  know   now   !

Nicole “Coco” Austin , rapper Ice-T’s main squeeze and fun toy. I wonder , where , when and how he makes or finds time to jack an’ tap that a_s up ? Inquiring minds need to know and they damn well need to know now !”

Alan Parkins 🙂


Author: tophatal ...........

An avid sports' fans that's all !!!!!

16 thoughts on “Missing In Action ………No This Isn’t One Of Chuck Norris’ Lame A_s Movies ……………….. Hello Tiger Meet Brett It Appears That The Two of You Have Something In Common ?”

    1. Chris Humpherys

      They both are indecisive. In the case of Woods, he’ll hide behind his lies and self denial . Whereas, Favre in some way will look to make others feel that thhey’re to blame for the situation that he’s placed them in. Never once admitting that he’s somehow to blame.

      Vida Guerra and her ever so ‘hot bod’ !

      Alan Parkins


  1. I’m not a big golf fan, so I won’t comment on Tiger, but Brett Favre I hate. And he is a diva. I respect his accomplishments, and I wouldn’t have such resentment over him if like you said, he didn’t turn his every off season into a worthless spectacle of will he or won’t he. He’s such an attention whore. When he finally does decide to hang it up, I bet you he ends up with a reality TV show. Watch.


    1. sportsguyby

      Even as an none aligned observer how can you not want to make a statement with regard to Woods ? This isn’t just purely a golf story or one seemingly just with regard to specific issues. It goes to the grain of what he alleges he’s about.

      He’s lied to his wife , family and friends. What’s even worse he’s a damn hypocrite in stance and how portrays himself to the public and in particular to the kids in attendance at his charter school , ran by his foundation. But I guess you don’t want to view him in that sort of light ?

      As to ,a href=”http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/players/1025″>Favre , like Woods he’ll no doubt use the press at his own convenience. But what I find completely asinine is the statement made by Vikings’ coach, Brad Childress . Hasn’t he or the Vikings’ front office learned anything about the player and his dealings with both the Jets and Packers ? I hope this burns the franchise in more ways than one ! Especially given the fact that they signed him to that 2yr $24 million contract.

      I’d hate to think that Favre’s actions will now not only in part overshadow the NFL events such as the Pro Bowl and Superbowl (SBXLIV) . But then also you have the upcoming NFL Draft in early April. And no doubt the paeans within ABC/ESPN Sports will be the gristle that keeps this story running throughout much of the off-season. Especially given the support and comments by their analysts such as Trent Dilfer and Mark Schlereth. Their support and the ways it’s portrayed without impartiality borders on being homo-erotic to say the very least . I’m half expecting either of the two to ‘come out of the closet’ and ‘declare their undying love for the guy’ !

      Alan Parkins


  2. The first word that comes to my mind when I hear the name Tiger Woods is stupid. How could Tiger not realize that all that cheating was not going to come back on him.

    Brett should announce that he is returning to the Vikings now and end all the speculation, but you know we’re not going to get that lucky.


    1. aero

      In this day and age, an ‘Ivy League’ education doesn’t count for much. As in the case with Tiger and the fact that he attended Stanford.

      His actions gives credence that’d make Paris Hilton seem like an MIT grad ?

      As for Favre, he’ll let this thing play out as long as he can, while at the same time stringing along the Vikings’ fans, their front office and damn idiot coach of theirs Brad Childress !

      Hope Bianca puts a smile on your face and stiffness in your lower extremities ? LOL,LOL,LOL !!!

      Alan Parkins


  3. Ah well….I don’t care one way or the other about either…but that said, do feel both deserve what ever they get. Brett is a “Hall of Famer” and the “Tiger” is the best thing to ever happen to the PGA.
    I think the bottom line is that the media has created these scenarios and really blown the whole thing out of proportion. The other thing is..the public, you and I, put these athletes, entertainers really, on pedestals and hero worship them. When their halo becomes tarnished by gaffes, small or large, we become all upset and aggrieved…how could our hero do this, yada, yada, yada. Then the media keeps it going, mainly to further their own agendas and interests…mainly to make more money.
    This has been going on since time began…Julius Caesar was assassinated cause those involved thought he was going to be too powerful, etc., etc. I think it is high time we only salute our “heroes” for their ahletic accomplishments, the rest……?


    1. al clements

      In both cases the media has created the circus after the fact. Tiger’s indiscretions caught up with him , while he still thought he could hide behind his so called ‘pristine lilly-white image. Never mind the fact of the shame and dishonor he’s brought upon himself and his immediate family. That’s something that cannot be overlooked.

      In Favre’s case what is it that we haven’t learned already by antics with the Jets and Packers ? And now we’re to believe that this time around it’ll be somehow different ? Not when he’s going to hold the city of Minneapolis , literally hostage by his indecision . Never mind the fact that the idiots within the Vikings’ front office and that idiot coach of theirs, in , Brad Childress seemingly backs Favre’s play. If he quits then it’s back to square one , once again. It makes the old adage appropriate here …..’ there’s a sucker born every minute’ Especially given Favre’s antics of his retiring , un-retiring and then retiring again.

      Let me know when you find employer who allows an employee of theirs to do something like that ? Perhaps they can offer us all a job and seemingly lifetime security ?

      Alan Parkins


    2. al clements

      If you’re talking about saluting our heroes by the way that they’re treated by the VA and the public in large part , your suggestion becomes all the more redundant. Never mind the fact you’ve got so called Christian conservative protesters out there stating that the death of a soldier in Afghanistan or Iraq is God’s way of condemning homosexuality.

      That’s the sought of asinine belief that organized religion can cause when there are zealots out there like this left to roam freely and unchecked.

      So next time around analyze your case before putting it forth.

      Alan Parkins


  4. Nah…I wasn’t speaking of the real heroes…I was speaking of the athletic “heroes” who are put on that damn pedestal…only deserved for their athletic prowess….ala the Tiger, Pete Rose and on and on. I said celebrate their ability, nothing more.
    Now, we know what is occuring with our persons who “serve to protect”…the GUVMINT, for all its grandstanding is still not doing enough for them….by the way that included me, you, every blessed fireman and policeman…plus Corrections’ Officers. ‘Nuff said?
    Guess I wasn’t to clear ’bout that hero thing.


    1. al clements

      I’d consider the likes of Tim Duncan and David Robinson ‘real heroes’ in the true sense of the word. They’ve given of themselves in order to help others less well of than themselves. From the tsunami efforts, to New Orleans and even making sure that kids in the greater San Antonio are afforded a form of education through the charter schools which they’ve both set up in the city as well as in Duncan’s homeland of the Virgin Islands.

      So in that respect I for one consider that to be heroic and it ought to be acknowledged as that. There are other athletes who’ll do various philanthropic deeds but would rather not publicize it. And there are others who’ll go out there and make the public aware. Which is far more than is being done by the likes of Beck, Coulter and that irascible asshole Sean Hannity !

      Alan Parkins


  5. I’m not going to say that Phil can take Tiger’s spot, but he’s golf’s hope at the moment. I wonder if he hooked up with Deanne Favre while he stayed with them?!? I would love to hear that story come out from TMZ!


    1. chappy

      If Phil had the temperament he’d have been world #1 some time ago. Do you even remember who the last American to hold that ranking was ? And no it wasn’t Phil.

      When you find out the answer let me know .

      It was prior to Tiger actually becoming a PGA Tour professional . So that’s your hint.

      And here’s another ……….name the golfer and that’ll be your boobie prize.

      Alan Parkins


  6. Ravenation LLC

    Schlereth and Mortensen have become so accustomed being close to Favre’s testes that the next thing that they’ll be doing is actually is sucking on his d_ck !

    It’s been said that Jenna Jameson is so in awe of their admiration of Favre that she’s prepared to give ’em a few clues and tips on how to suck _ick successfully.

    Alan ……………..


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